“If He’s Not Paying Bills, He Shouldn’t Be Costing You Energy”
Keep Reading What No One Talks About.
Real Talk you were never supposed to admit out loud.
🧲 Let’s Talk About It
He’s not sending money.
He’s not offering help.
He’s not solving problems.
But somehow…
he’s still in your phone,
in your head,
in your space.
And every time he calls or texts, you pause your life for a man who wouldn’t pause his day to help you with a single bill.
Let’s talk about it.
Because if a man isn’t contributing to your peace, your bills, or your well-being —
he has no business draining your energy.
🧠 This Is Why You Feel What You Feel
You’re not crazy.
You’re not “too much.”
You’re not heartless for wanting more.
You’ve just reached a point where you realize:
Love isn’t enough when the lights are due.
Vibes don’t cover rent.
And “good morning” texts don’t stop the eviction notices.
You’re not bitter — you’re just done sponsoring men who bring nothing but distraction.
You’ve already worked too hard for too little.
You’ve already sacrificed stability for chemistry.
You’ve already “believed in potential” and got nothing but problems in return.
So here’s your reminder:
If he’s not helping —
he shouldn’t be holding space in your life.
🔍 BREAKDOWN (How to Check the Energy-to-Contribution Ratio)
Let’s break it down.
Is he:
💬 Constantly texting, calling, needing attention?
😒 Always talking about his problems but never asking about yours?
🧾 Aware of your struggles but never offers to help with anything?
🛑 Quick to call you “too independent” when you don’t chase him?
Then sis — he’s costing you.
Not financially… yet.
But emotionally.
Mentally.
Energetically.
And that adds up.
💡 Flip the Script: MEN WHO DON’T INVEST IN YOU WILL ALWAYS DRAIN YOU
It’s not about being “all about money.”
It’s about mutual investment.
You’re giving:
Your time
Your softness
Your energy
Your emotional availability
Sometimes even your money or food
He’s giving:
Vibes
Phone convos
Maybe some “company”
Excuses
This is not a partnership.
It’s a one-sided subscription — and you’re paying in peace.
📍 REAL-LIFE CHECKLIST
Ask yourself:
🧠 After he calls/texts, do I feel lighter or heavier?
🏠 Has he ever offered to ease my real-life burdens?
💵 Has he ever invested anything into my life — time, money, effort, solutions?
📉 Do I shrink or settle just to keep him around?
If you said “yes” to the heaviness and “no” to the investment —
you already have your answer.
💬 WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE DONE WITH VIBE-ONLY MEN
Text Script 1:
“You’re cool, but I’m in a season where I can’t keep energy around that doesn’t add to my life. I’m not mad — just choosing peace.”
Text Script 2:
“You’ve got a lot of access to me… but no contribution. That’s not working for me anymore.”
Text Script 3 (if he’s aware of your struggles):
“If you can watch me struggle and still offer nothing, you don’t deserve front-row access to me.”
💎 TRUTH BOMB:
If a man isn’t helping your life feel lighter,
he’s making it heavier — and you’re carrying that weight.
He doesn’t have to be rich.
He just has to be intentional.
Present.
Supportive.
Generous in some way — even if small.
Because a man who cares will find a way to lift the load — not just your legs.
❤️ FINAL TAKEAWAY
You’re not wrong for wanting more.
You’re not a gold digger for valuing support.
You’re not mean for saying “no” to men who offer you everything but help.
You’re just a woman who’s done sacrificing her peace for:
Proximity
Vibes
Text messages
Or "potential"
If he’s not helping carry the load —
he shouldn’t be adding to it.
Choose ease.
Choose clarity.
Choose men who bring solutions — not just stimulation.